Said & Heard

Life is crazy and here is a small list of things that my friends and I never in five million years would have imagined we would actually say or in some cases hear....

Said - "What did you do to him?!!!  Did you break him?!!"  said to a GF in the morning after a GNO with a young man passed out in the fetal position at the end of the bed, fully clothed, with his feet hanging off the edge, who did not even stir when I played bongos on his ass.

Said - "No I dont have any condoms in this house, and if you get some bring some back for me, cause we need some too."  said to the same GF the night before

Said - "Ok is there anyone here who did not have sex last night?"  said to four of my GFs one morning when doing our debriefing

Said - "Wow...good thing I used my stopping powers" said in a delirious state to my GF when I applied the brakes in order not to run a stop sign.

Said - "Well that guy is hot.  Someone needs to bang that kid tonight."

Said - "Ummm....do you know where my clothes are?"

Said - "OMGosh you could knock me over with a feather!!!  Seriously!!!  A year and a half later and that boy is calling me!!!!  That is some power pussy right there." 
                         "Girl, you got the illest pussy on the planet! "

Heard - "Um does anybody know who I drove home last night?"

Heard - "Wow, Jessica making pancakes and Jessica in the Club are TOTALLY different."

Heard - "Sex all night!" cute boy breaking into song in falsetto voice the next morning about his accomplishments

Heard -"Well you know, you just need a lover that understands what you are going thru.  I am totally here for you and will be happy to have lots of sex with you at any time.  You can talk or cry, or whatever you need to do, and if you like some kinky stuff I can do that too.  I'm totally here for you.   Any time you like.  Really.  I really mean it."

Heard - "Say my name"  by a hottie when getting busy, then "Shut up!"  when I began to emit too much noise.

Heard  - "Oh thats ok honey, you can just work in your office and I wont bother you at all.  I'll just lick your pussy while you are working."  said to one GF by an adoring young man

Heard - "Well, you know I just love children.  They really gradjitate to me."  said to GF by husbands crappy lover that he left her for...in mediation with the priest

Heard - "Wow you are just so graceful and elegant."  immediately followed by the graceful person crashing into a stationary wall. 

Heard - "What the hell happened last night?  I actually touched my vagina this morning to see if I was sore!"  said by GF after a GNO with wine that affected us badly

Heard - "Well you know girl.....once a good girl gone bad, she gone bad fo'eva."  said by my gay to me